Did you know that, today, the 9th of April, is National Unicorn Day? No? Neither did I until last week.
I struggled to believe that such a ‘day’ existed, so I Googled it and, yup, there it is – April 9, National Unicorn Day. How bizarre! I have but just the one question. Why? (Apparently, it’s to give children a fun day to celebrate and nothing at all to do with a cynical marketing ploy by toy manufacturers.)
My Google search also highlighted an old Change.org petition that sought to move the ‘celebratory’ day from 9 April to 6 June. Who does this kind of thing? Or is it me that’s the idiot and not the petitioners (don’t answer that!)?
Anyway, just to show that coincidences happen all the time, I had, purely by chance, just written a unicorn limerick for my ice-cream buddy.
She’d asked for a copy of one of my B&W film photography exhibition prints, a print of some street art in Aberdeen that shows a girl holding a unicorn, so I wrote a dedication in limerick fashion and pasted it to the back of the picture frame.
NuArt, Correction Wynd, Aberdeen.
So here, on the one and only occasion that I will recognise National Unicorn Day, is a unicorn limerick:
An idea that some can’t resist, Is that unicorns really exist. But they’re hard to espy And that explains why You don’t see them unless you’re half-pissed!
I’m quite pleased to see the back of 2016, but for what it’s worth here are some pics for my ‘best of’ compendium for the year …
Best new experience of the year:
A bread-making course at ‘Bread Ahead’ (Borough Market, London). Just me and a bunch of Chelsea girls loafing around …
You know you’re in trouble when your sourdough goes a-rye
Best ice-cream of the year:
Beating Zanoni’s of Vienna by a short head was the first ice-cream pit stop of the year.
Cycling on a sundae …
Best blog idea of the year:
A limerick a week. How else can one show one’s proficiency at celebrating #TeamDemelza in verse with an anapestic meter and strict rhyme scheme?
Why a limerick? Because ‘There was once a man who wrote poems …’
Best cycle ride of the year:
Finally, at the age of 24, Firstborn scraped her knee whilst participating in a physical outdoor activity. Her mother was so proud 🙂
Blood, sweat and gears …
Best health tip of the year:
… and from the Graun: Bike rides and hot baths – a fitness match made in heaven and it’s official!
Oh dear, I’m in hot water again!
Best impression of a marine mammal of the year:
Management performing dolphinarium tricks (we’d boycotted Marineland Mallorca whilst on holiday) with Firstborn as the ‘trainer’.
Does this trick make my bum look big?
Best meal of the year:
The most hotly contested category of all. It could easily have been the baked brie at the Crofters Bistro, Rosemarkie, or the scallops at the Applecross Inn or the mega-breakfast at the Hatton Locks café or the liver and bacon at the Tigh an Eilean Hotel, Shieldaig. But by a country mile, ‘hats off’ please to the Gasthaus Ubl in Vienna for keeping traditional Austrian cuisine alive and at its best. Roast pork, sauerkraut and dumplings like my Grandma used to make. Großartig!
“Il semble que la perfection soit atteinte non quand il n’y a plus rien a ajouter, mais quand il n’y a plus rien a retrancher” – Antoine de saint-Exupery.
Best sausage of the year:
Another Viennese delight – mit brot und senf, of course
Absolutely the wurst experience that we had on holiday …
As aficionados of the movie ‘Priscilla; Queen of the Desert’ will tell you, calling it Priscilla certainly puts the ‘camp’ into ‘campervan’
Best fresh air of the year:
As sensitive bio-indicators of atmospheric pollution, these lichens growing on a wooden bench seat next to the main road through Lochcarron attest to the freshness of its air. Unusually for Scotland the air was still on the day this picture was taken, making it the best fresh air of the year!
I’m lichen it …
Best concert of the year:
No real competition here. Bellowhead on a Saturday night at the London Palladium during the band’s farewell tour. Simply awesome.
Folk music ‘rebooted’ or as I would say,”traditional music given a kick up the a**e!”
Best offspring pose of the year:
Firstborn and The Tall Child ‘having a moment’.
I never called you a mushroom. I said you were a fun guy!
Extempore verse composed in honour of my Ice Cream Buddy on the relinquishment of her wisdom teeth:
Her dentist was pleased to advise her That from canine right through to incisor Her teeth were just fine But that now was the time For her molars to become “none the wiser”!
Now the weather has turned in our favour it’s time to get serious on the bike and hit the first ‘half-way’ ice cream of the year (the pic was taken at Banchory looking downstream on the River Dee).
